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Saturday, September 18, 2021

Hondo Ohnaka Admits to Galactic Stock Rigging Scheme

Hondo: “I Smelled Profit!”

The notorious outlaw and pirate is now famous for a new crime: rigging the galactic trade federation market.

BATUU — Infamous criminal pirate Hondo Ohnaka admitted to rigging the Galactic Trade Federation Stock Market in an elaborate scheme for profits. Imperial soldiers are scouring the galaxy looking to take the outlaw into custody. The confession comes in the wake of previous charges of treason, piracy, and defrauding intergalactic tourists to run smuggling operations with the Millennium Falcon.

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In his statement Ohnaka said, “Imperial insiders have controlled the market with an iron grip. But a Sith Lord is no match for my advanced trading droids. Now the Empire wants to blame me because they lost!? Outrageous!”

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As to charges of insolence leveled against the pirate by the imperial leadership, Ohnaka is unmoved. “Insolence?! We are pirates! We don’t even know what that means.”

The rogue Weequay noted “While this scandal has caused me to receive even more notoriety than usual, to all those who want to understand me, I suggest you spend 30 credits to get yourself a copy of my new venture ‘The Book of Hondo.’ Available wherever the finest wares are sold. It is money well spent friend!”

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